From the beginning of this journey, one thing I have personally struggled with is the finances.  Those that know me, know I tend to be pretty fiscally responsible. We’ve worked pretty hard to eliminate the debt from our lives, and aside from our mortgage and Thomas’ “brain” (a.k.a. student loans), we have.  We don’t have a crazy nest egg, and live fairly simply, often giving away our excess.  Things like vacations were saved for and paid for in full.   Fundraising was a HUGE reason we had initially ruled out adopting internationally.

So then why would God call us to this? Why are we being led to a long and expensive process?

I was too comfortable.  I was too independent.  I was too self-sufficient. I was too selfish.  I was too…, I…, you get the idea.

What I needed was to experience God. To do that I needed to become uncomfortable, dependent on Him, recognize my own insufficiencies, become selfless, and let God work, in me first.

I love to give. Send someone dinner, support missionaries, surprise someone in need, help out a friend, or donate to a cause.  Receiving is sometimes uncomfortable. But, when you have a child on your heart, one that is yours, even if a world away, and you can’t even put their name in print yet, you give up a little bit of that pride.

In giving up that pride and fundraising I have learned that:

  • This is much bigger than me.  I didn’t want to be embarrassed, or look bad for asking for help. God is calling us to adopt. It’s about bringing Him glory, not about my pride.
  • We are called to give, to share what we have. In Acts 4:34-37 they lived communally. (I heard a pretty good sermon about this last Sunday, if you missed it you can find it here. (If it’s not up yet, it will be soon.)   This doesn’t work unless we are willing to accept when we are in need.
  • It is a tangible way to know we are being supported. There are plenty of times, we have wondered – “Are we crazy? Is this mountain scalable?” Each time we are affirmed by the financial and emotional support of friends and family.  So, are we crazy?  Definitely, but it’s the good kind of crazy!
  • I am not alone. I have the support of friends and family. Not just in raising funds, but when it gets real and crazy – when we are getting ready to bring him home, when we are dealing with medical issues, when I’m juggling two pre-school schedules, etc.

Most importantly, I am being obedient to God. He is not a prize at the end of this, but holding me and pushing us forward. Why? He loves the orphan, and I do too. I am serving Him my adopting a lost child and bringing him into my family – a full heir.  Others are helping the orphan by helping us (and/or others) in their journey to bring a child home. Russell Moore explains this much better than I can in “Adopted for Life

Our adoption by God, making us full heirs with Christ, cost Him separation from his Son, and watching Him suffer a punishment He didn’t deserve, so that we could become part of the family. Swallowing my pride and accepting help to do His will doesn’t seem like such a big deal after all.